# Living with NTs

- URL: https://numo.ai/community/XKpNN7GklWJDWrerblOj/living-with-nts
- Language: en
- Author: @bidderButt23
- Posted: 2023-06-08T18:39:31.022Z
- Tag: hack/tip
- Comments: 5
- Likes: 3

Living with Neuro-typical (NTs) roommates has it's pros and cons. Our brains fundamentally function differently and therefore we experience a lot of "culture clashes." Here are a few things that help my household minimize those clashes:

1. Group chat- on the days I feel Nonverbal, or I don't have the bandwidth to mask and emote, I let my roommates know. A quick "hey, I'm non verbal today!" text will bypass any 'what's wrong?' or 'are your mad at me?' questions. They give me my space and I give them their's. 

2. Safe words- when out in public, and I get overwhelmed or overstimulated, I freeze and/or bolt. I IMMEDIATELY need remove myself from the situation to avoid a panic attack.

 I, as an adult, can usually do this on my own. However, it's very odd when a person randomly stands up from the table and walks out on brunch without saying a single word. 

This is where a safe word comes in. I'll simply turn to my friends (or whomever I'm with) and say "I am so sorry, but Pumpernickel.” They will immediately understand that I am not trying to be rude, or trying to cause a scene, I'm just trying to regulate myself, and I'm doing what my body needs in that moment.

Again, this limits the amount of communication that would normally be needed. And I can gracefully exit without too much fuss, or without being forced to stay in a torturous situation. 

What are some of YOUR tips n tricks?

## Comments (3)

### @lsutigerlily — 2023-06-09T15:41:05.438Z

My husband uses the phrase “Elmo” to mean we’ve exhausted the topic of conversation and I need to hit the brakes. Sometimes I need a reminder that my brain doesn’t ever stop; it just changes direction.

### @starweaver — 2023-06-09T04:23:28.190Z

Love the safe word idea!

### @thisisnotmyname — 2023-06-08T20:32:32.319Z

Those are really good ideas. I may start using those with my family. Thanks.