I keep inadvertently hurting my mom and husband with my wording, of normal conversation, and sometimes confrontation. Idk what I’m doing wrong. I’m in therapy. She said I need to start with my self talk first. She says the way I talk about myself is hurtful as well. Just wondering if this is an ADHD thing, or just a human thing…
Posts and comments here share personal experience — not medical advice. For treatment questions, talk to a clinician.
Communication is incredibly difficult. I offend people continuously or am misunderstood. I agree with mindfulness. Practice restraint instead of speaking your thoughts out loud when you’re around certain people who take you wrong. Just keep on trying. Also, maybe it’s them and not you. Hahah good luck
I am currently in the same situation. It has been recommened to try mindfulness, I'm currently reading up on what that really is. I do believe it's an adhd thing to speak to others like this, it's our defense mechanism that's been developed over the years. I don't know how to fix it though, I'm also struggling pretty bad with upsetting those around me as well as my own self talk is pretty rough.
Idk if its an ADHD thing, but I struggle with not knowing if I'm being rude and typically my momma has to tell me if I am being rude and ill apologize and feel bad for hours🤣🤣 like at work I once laughed (like a nervous laugh) because I never heard of that particular name before and the customer was pissed, I felt so horrible for the rest of the day. Came home and told my husband the story and he just assured me that I wasn't in the wrong and that some people are just sensitive
When it comes to communication, especially in the workplace, two things that help me are being transparent about having ADHD and keeping one of the “four agreements” in mind: “What others think or say about you had nothing to do with you.” What people say and think is a resurrection of themselves. There are people who believe that there is no such thing as ADHD and others will say that we use it as a crutch. With the knowledge that I’m doing the best I can with what I know to manage my ADHD and its symptoms helps me to focus on me and ignore condescending opinions. It felt weird at first, but I will look into the mirror and talk to myself like I would my friend to remind me of my strengths. I’m in therapy, too. Finding the right therapist, if you go that route, is crucial. I absolutely believe this is ADHD related because we ADHDers think and understand things differently. Be kind and gentle with yourself.