Parents can fail you...
And they can sabotage you. My ADHD is not the big challenge I face. It's the constant toxicity I grew up with and copied and learnt to be normal. Instead of support, I got self-blame Instead of responsibility, I got guilt reversal Instead of apologies, I got excuses Instead of respect, I got disregard Somehow my mom managed to undermine ANY attempt of mine to develop a sense of purpose and self respect and standing up for myself and others, she taught me to shut down and freeze. I wasn't allowed to act. I had to be blamed for being too embarrassing. Other people's needs were way bigger than mine. My worries are not worth to worry about. I was just too lazy and weird and loud. I was never good enough... My childhood depressions just a phase and to get attention... No. My ADHD would be a breeze to handle... If I only could accept that I am allowed to be. And allowed to grow Now I have to unlearn all that and learn all that. Yes parents can fail you. And they never learn to take their responsibility. But It's not YOU that is their fault. It is THEIR fault failing you. ♥️ One day I will know this for real
First, I totally support your right to feel what feel, and it’s probably very important to your recovery. However, since ADHD is very hereditary, maybe they were treating you as they were treated themselves. Maybe through generations. It could be all they knew. For yourself and knowing that you came from them regardless, at whatever time it begins to feel possible for you, consider forgiveness. That doesn’t mean accepting what they did was right, because it wasn’t. It may mean accepting that they were doing their flawed best. The most important thing is that forgiveness is more for you than for them. It could eventually free you from those old bonds. I feel your pain through your writing and I pray for healing. You are good and you are loved. I hope you can break the cycle.