Christmas

It’s gonna be my first Christmas with my family for about three years just because when it’s come round in the past iv either been off my head on class A drugs self medicating with no diagnosis and thinking to myself that there was something wrong with me? Or my anxiety and depression was so bad that I wasn’t a very nice person to be around at the time! I’m looking forward to seeing them all and showing them how far iv come with my diagnosis and being three and a half months clean and sober, and im on the road to a more structured and less chaotic lifestyle, iv not been in trouble with the law since September and now I know why I was so impatient with recovery in the past and constantly loved the thrill of the chase, not knowing what the hell id get myself into that day, now im putting things in place to make sure I never relapse and go back to live in total darkness again coz there’s no way I’d live through another stint getting clean again! Im getting to old for that’s mugs game now! Time to build my self esteem and confidence and get out there to see if iv still got it? lol